I was dismayed to find that I wasn't quite so invisible as I thought. I let my emotions become too evident, and my mask began to slip. I have been... careless. I'll admit that, just a little, I wanted to be found, but that was foolish. I thought it would make me happy. But my friends from school have no idea and show no signs of care. No need to worry them. Within a few weeks I will graduate high school and never see many of them again. This has a wide range of pros and cons.
...I still have that wish, though. I dare not speak it, for I know how truly absurd it is. The very idea! Ha! No, no wishes for me. All I ever learned from love was how to shoot someone who outdrew you.
I wonder what you'll say when you see this. Will you discard it as more moaning? Will you rush to me and talk of your "concern"? No. You won't do any of that, because you'll never see this. I'm far too stubborn for that.
Whatever.
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Listen to This:
- Daniel Renquist
- This is just another new thing that's become old. If you're reading this, then you must be very determined indeed. But I digress. This is where I pour out what cannot be said anywhere else. Sometimes, this can be a little depressing or foolish, so bear with me.
4 comments:
hi.
no one really blogs anymore, do they? i mean... i know the world of blogs and our connections in that manner began dwindling long ago... are you the only one keeping it alive anymore? weird
so...
it wouldn't let me log on, guess they changed everything a bit...
you probably won't read this for awhile...
i miss you. i miss all of you
hope you enjoy graduating =)
so i hear you are thinkin bout moving out... i'd love to know how ur life is going, details... oh well
if i could go back and change things... would i...?
wow
um. yes, i would change some things, i definitely would, but only some things...
i'm afraid it wouldn't make any difference in the here and now though
i'm not sure i answered your question very well though. ...i wish we still... saw each other, i miss our friendship. but it seems rather impossible now, doesn't it? it does to me
i want to know how your doing. god i want to know. oh well =)
Three cheers for your Rufus Wainwright reference...kind of...because if you're feeling as full of despair as that poor man does at the piano, well, that certainly does evoke some concern. Not "concern". So throw away your mask for a few hours and call me so we can talk about this shizz in slightly less cryptic language.
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